Teen banned from Twitter, Vine, for banging Ham and Cheese Hot Pocket

The teenager who had sex with a hot pocket came forward and explained his reasoning for doing it.

The teen is known by his Twitter handle VersacePockets. He said that his reason was to gain internet fame.

He said: “I tried doing it without a condom and it was just, like, way too hot. I put it in the fridge for a little bit and I was like, ‘Dude, I’m gonna have to use a condom if I’m gonna actually stick my d**k in the whole Hot Pocket.’”

He was kicked off of Twitter and Vine, and blocked by @hotpockets.

Fake chef punks news peeps with gravy smoothies and potato cones

A fake chef managed to book himself on Wisconsin local news programs.

The creators of a touring comedy show called the Found Footage Festival introduced a guy named Chef Keith.

The fake chef made five TV apperances, ” giving tips for sprucing up ypur holiday lefovers, even though he wasn’t a real guy.”

He blended meat, corn, ham and other holiday staples into a drink and some of the hosts even drank it.

He mentioned to hosts that he was self-taught before giving advice to “Put on your corn sprinkles, and don’t forget the cranberry cherry on top.”

The prankster claimed that “everyone at the news station was delightful and thanked me for coming on afterward.”

He added, “They wished me the best of luck on my book. Bless them and their tolerance for putting up with an idiot both on and off air.”

Seth Rogen testifies before congress

Sure, there are plenty of jokes in his testimony, but it’s about a serious cause.  Rogen discussed his mother-in-law’s Alzheimer’s disease and his work setting up the foundation Hilarity for Charity, which raises awareness for the disease among young people.

This chick is gonna marry her bike, ride the new groom

Well, this is a bit weird.

A woman posted a crowdfunding campaign, to help her marry her bike.

She also plans to travel for 6 months, work on service projects, and develop a “Semester on Cycle” college program.

According to her Indiegogo campaign — $85 gets you in the Bachelor Party, $1500 gets you a Nude Photo of the Bride, and $2K gets you a pic of the Bride Riding the Groom.

The wedding will be a modest luau affair and the honeymoon road trip will last as long as her resources hold out.

She will couch surf, camp, budget $20 a day and blog about all of her progress.

Frisbee trick shots in Dubai

Dubai must be the best place to get this bored in.